So yesterday I learned how to clean teeth properly, turns out I’ve been doing it wrong my whole life! Who knew?

In other news I finally got my awesome photographer friend Emma North of Fairytale Asylum Photography to photograph my latest Mokuhanga bits, they’re so pretty, and yes I know I’m so modest right? There is a picture above; well there might be if I remember to put one in :S

I have also recently re-discovered my childhood obsession with Shire horses!

Isn't she pretty? I want one! She’d totally fit in my back garden and would be a handy alternative transportation method.  See how I’ve already justified acquiring a giant pony to live in my garden and eat all of the flowers I'm such a grown up! :) 

Gotta say I’ve always had a deep-seated desire to own a horse but I was stupidly under the believe that I had grown out of it, until a couple of weeks ago when I went to Doonies Farm with Sophie and Xanthe and we had an awesome day! Everyone should go! We got to feed a huge pig, got followed around by the biggest sheep I’ve ever seen and witnessed a shouting competition between cockerels (the not so wee moody looking fellow in the middle being the winner).

Save to say I’ve had a great wee while, well you know in-between work :( Being a grown up sucks, lets go back to the farm!

So after my mega month of work, as we have christened it, I was rewarded with a week off. Yay! What did do the first day? Slept! Then I went on a mission to show my friends and family that I haven't disappeared off the face of the earth. Which I think was largely successful. I just really enjoyed having time off! The cherry on the cake was spending a little time in Edinburgh. I just love that city! Oh and I bought new shoes :) 

Hope you guys had a good week too. But its back to work for me tonight :(

To those of you who know me, my elephant obsession shouldn't come as a surprise. It's not exactly a secret if you walk into my bedroom you'd think it was some weird shrine to the bizarrely beautiful creatures. And indeed I draw them quite often … like all over the place. 

Well today my uncle proved how awesome he is. He knitted me an elephant! That’s him above (the elephant not my uncle) He hasn't got a name yet but I’m working on it :)

Happy Monday guys, may you all have elephant filled weeks!

This last week I have been facing a dilemma that I must admit is pretty much foreign territory to me. I've been broody. Not only a little broody either, I’ve been out and out craving a baby, which is very weird for me. I'm not criticizing all you awesome Mums and Dads out there quite the opposite really I think you guys are brilliant and I’m sure your mini humans will grow up to be really cool individuals. But for me kids rant anywhere near the top of my to-do list. 

I think maybe this bizarre hormonal want was made stronger because I wasn't expecting to run into 4-week-old Nathan and I certainly wasn't expecting him to be so tiny and perfect! With his little nose and his little hands and...

Wait! Stop! It’s happening again!

My sister will be the first to tell you that I am probably the least maternal woman on this planet having often been known to look extremely like I’m being tortured while she and my mother coo and talk utter nonsense at random passing buggies. And indeed I’m far more at home with worrying about how to hide the hair dye stain on the bathroom wall from my sister (Charlotte if you are reading this, the stain does not exist * does cool Jedi mind trick wave thing*) or trying to resist the urge to sack someone because there's no chocolate. I feel that worrying about being responsible for a tiny thing that eats, screams and poops would be a bit of a stretch for me right now. But nonetheless my body was screaming for a baby. I think I’m much better fitted to being the crazy aunty than the responsible mum though.

Some times being a woman really sucks! I don't understand myself how can any guy be expected to understand the weird and complex explosion of emotions that make me who I am?

On the upside I just say Look up and I happen to think it is pretty amazing! Here is a link for the rest of you! Have a Great May Day Guys!

Arrrrgh! I feel so incredably old! Last Thursday my little sister turned 20! Like 2 decades old! How is this possible?!



It seems like only yesterday she was an impressively annoying and rather scary teenager and only last week that she was actually smaller than me and not a freakish giant!



Other than feeling ancient and tiny I've been getting severly irritated with my bruise ability.

The weather is getting nicer and skirts and dresses are far more appealing options. That is unless you, like mysel, have legs that look like a patchwork of purples, yellows and blues. While being colourful is often something I pridemyself in when their bruises I prefer to avoid looking like a battered woman :S



Hope you guys aren't also having an age crisis. Happy Monday!

eing the numpty that I am I actually thought last Monday was Sunday but hey-ho life goes on.

Any of you guys or more likely girls ever heard of glossy boxes?

Well due to seeing my friends lovely glossy box I have been a subscriber for maybe 7 or 8 months now and normally I love the contents. This months box arrived today and I have to say I’m very disappointed. While I’m the first to admit that I’m not really the most informed when it comes to make up I do know that I adore being pale and pasty I'm Scottish its my natural way of being! 

So finding I’d been given a tan in a tube didn't make me overly happy, we also got a small angled brush unfortunately the little information leaflet they normally provide to help the less knowledgeable such as myself was missing so not only do I not know what the brush is for (possibly lips?) I got a rather pretty little shiny bottle of pink stuff … I have no idea what it's for or where I’m meant to put it? I actually thought it was nail polish to begin with and was completely mystified as to why it wasn't drying, oops. It does smell nice though. 

I did like that I got a full-sized bottle of dry shampoo though. I love having my lazy side indulged and the ginger massage oil smells sooooo good!

Must say I’m not chuffed with only liking two out of five make-up bitties. If it's not better next month it shall be getting cancelled.

On a side note has any one seen those new B&Q adverts? Yes I know their completely knaf but for some reason I just love them.

Just a wee note to tell you guys to check out Gemma Balfour Typewriter Artist's Facebook page. I went to art school with Gemma and she is amazingly talented.  
On a lighter note if you don't check out Gemma's page I will feed you to the turtles! 
Enjoy the weekend guys.

Sorry guys I’m not feeling ranty today. Emotional, weepy and knackered yes. But not ranty. 

Today was my last night at a job that I’ve really loved (if you ignore the burning hellfire I felt for my now ex employer) I'm really going to miss the family I was working with because they had been through more in a few years than I hope I’ll ever have to go through in my life and are still such a strong unit that just oozes with love, loyalty and determination. 

Naturally I brought the kids a wee present while I was visiting the stock cars last weekend (which were awesome) and in turn they bought me flowers! This year has been amazing in terms of flowers but I’m not sure that makes up for all the sad and emotionally testing things me and my loved ones have been through. They do make the place smell nice though.

So I apologise again for my lack of (self proclaimed) witty banter and wacky tales.

On the upside, we have wine! YAY! And a day off tomorrow! YAY! And flowers! YAY 

Bring on the trashy telly!

P.S is anyone else as upset with the cliffhanger end to the latest series of Bluestone 42? 

This past week, I’ve been rushed off my feet, I’m in that annoying limbo stage where I’m wiring out my notice for one job while I’ve started my new job so basically I’m always working. Which strangely doesn't bother me as much as I thought it might. However my current lack of time for anything has left me noticing some huge markets for some very specific merchandise

Firstly I think someone really needs to get off his or her arse and invent a stopwatch that stops time. Bernard had one so why can't I?  For those of you who don't get that reference Bernard was a kid who had a watch that could stop time in a TV show from the 90's it was imaginatively titled 'Bernard's Watch', it was kind of awesome. If anyone knows where I can get one of these, please contact me! 

Secondly I think its about time someone came out with a morning routine in a pot, like some kind of thingy-ma-bobber that you open and 30 seconds later you’re washed, dressed and presentable enough to walk out the door, the deluxe model should also hand you a cup of coffee (I'd pay more for coffee but wouldn't be all?). Would much prefer to do it this way so I wouldn't have to wake up stupidly early and I can't be the only one?

Lastly I believe that it's crucially important that someone makes a real FLDSMDFR or The Flint Lockwood Diatonic Super Mutating Dynamic Food Replicator for those of you who are not familiar with the work of genius that is 'Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs'. This is an awesome machine that makes any kind of food that you wish and in 'Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs 2' it creates living food or 'Foodimals' which are just amazing! I want a Watermelophant! 

If any of you guys create this stuff I want a cut of the profits for being your grumpy inspiration.